socially speaking

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WARNING: This blog has been doused in bold pretension. It is not for the faint of heart or those that easily find their panties in a wad. Thank you and please proceed with caution.

You know, I love to write. I love to express my thoughts and feelings creatively and usually, I feel like I do a good job adequately expressing how I feel. Let’s see if I can keep it up.

Social media is a funsucker, it sucks the joy out of everything because regardless of what opinion you’re expressing, someone is going to pick it apart with their teeth and thoroughly enjoy the taste, and they’re going to do it big and bold enough for everyone to see. Social media is negative if you use it that way.

I’m aware that by posting anything, anywhere on the web, you’re setting yourself up and asking for criticism, and I generally and genuinely appreciate that. It helps me grow as a writer and as a person and I find it intellectually stimulating.

I have stated to my friends countless times that I hate Facebook because: 1) it’s turned in to Babybook and while my friends’ kids are adorable, there are other things I’d like to see and 2) there are just endless amounts of bullshit drama that float around that I could care less to be accidentally clued-in on. I keep it only to stay in touch with people I don’t live nearby or don’t chat with frequently via text or phone. I could say that I only use it to shop for men, but most of you would take me seriously. <— Sarcasm.

It’s an ideal way to communicate, but we all do a shitty job of it most of the time.

It is quite possibly the worst place to express your opinion because no matter what you write, you’re wrong. I’ve only recently started expressing bolder opinions on my blog (and in my life because I don’t enjoy stepping on toes,) and the way light-hearted opinions are received are all but comical. Does anyone besides me and my super-hot, football-loving boyfriend (whom I found on Facebook – ZING!) read or watch comedy anymore? Or are we all just wired to immediately negate everything we come in to contact with? The world we freaking live in, the intentionally misconstrued.

A friend of mine almost line-by-line picked one of my blogs apart and right on my wall because she wanted to what? Make a point? I’m glad she has her own opinion and I’m happy she’s comfortable enough to write it down and express it, but for heaven’s sake, there are more tactful ways of going about it. I feel the same way about when I post lyrics to a song as my status and my mom/aunts/etc. immediately comment below with “what’s wrong w u?” First of all, that’s not a complete sentence, so I’m not responding to that. Secondly………they’re song lyrics. No, Neil and I didn’t break up. No, I’m not naked in the rain getting a tattoo on a train. I’m so serious, people read in to everything.

I just really can’t fathom why on earth someone would just outright launch an attack on what I can only consider to be “personal space.” Sure, the refute could be made, “well if you don’t want a comment made then don’t say anything,” and that’s a true statement. To that I say, there is such a thing as silent respect for another’s opinion and  there is such a thing as tact…but I am fully aware that a large number of people do not possess that quality. Blatant disrespect and ugliness doesn’t compute to me, though I know some people on the web defy what you say just to inspire a rise out of you. I can’t stand petty shit like that. I am horrified with thoughts of what the “dislike” button on Facebook will do. That’s alooooooot of negativity floating around and I’m super uninterested in that.

I would never dream of belittling anyone outright on social media, unless it was Lindsey Lohan or if the issue turned personal. In that situation, I would certainly choose to private message or email the person before blasting them publicly. I never ask for anyone’s opinion on my opinion unless I know 100% that the conversation will be positive, constructive and healthy, regardless of debate. DEBATE, not argument; that I don’t support or tolerate on social media – or in life – whatsoever, I think it’s silly. There’s no reason why things can’t be simply discussed without overdosing on negative energy.

I really hate making any sort of expression on social media now, though I’ll continue to use it because a writer needs her platform and if my platform is pissing people off on social media, well guess what–oh my, oh my….she’s found her niche! <— Sarcasm

It’s really a shame….whether it is a brief comment on the way you feel towards something, a relationship change, new “life event” or what have you, is so criticized under a seemingly ever-watchful eye, that it makes expressing yourself not worth the trouble. It’s amusing and flattering to an extent that people will expend such energy on nit-picking and commenting on the inner workings of your life, though they have absolutely no business doing so. Clearly, not much is happening in their lives if they’ve got enough time and focus to write negative things. (Though everyone is entitled to do so if they wish.)

Unfortunately, social media is a necessity. We communicate with it, advertise and socialize with it. It’s used for screening job applicants and it is used to stalk your exes with zeal. There isn’t much we can throw out in to the universe now without some sort of negativity or rebuttal or ruthless, public judgement and that’s incredibly frustrating.

I honestly prefer Instagram to any of the rest of it because, for whatever reason, people seem less cruel. This really amuses me because Instagram is nothing but pictures with hashtags and brief captions. The ability to belittle, deconstruct and destroy is abundant, yet there is hardly any backlash (from person-to-person, that I’ve seen and experienced, I’m sure the negativity is out there.) I like the idea of documenting the things that happen during my day without having to read 65846798675 comments of why that selfie was lame or how I could have taken the picture better or “Oh my gosh, it’s so filtered. No one looks like that.” Seriously, the general public’s attitude just sucks and everyone can agree to that to some degree. Though I know most of you reading this will disagree just for funzies.

This reflection makes it obvious I’m finding continued amusement in the happenings of the week, because those who actually know me can read a line or two of what I write and immediately determine whether or not I’m being serious. I know that the tone of what you’re reading can really determine your feelings on the subject, and as a writer I fight the constant battle of my intention and expression getting lost in translation. I know that posting anything of opinion runs the risk of being offensive, but as any sort of decent writer, that’s a risk I’m willing to take. I can’t help if my audience automatically wants to pick apart my piece just because they’re trying to prove a point. I mean really, if I wanted to read your ramblings I would just ask you how I felt on the subject. No I wouldn’t. <— Sarcasm

In additional defense – the last I’ll say – of my “football” post, the first one that really pissed in everyone’s coffee, I think it’s hilarious that it wasn’t taken as a comical piece but rather viewed as pretentious; I really find this rather droll. If you know me at all, I am the first one to ask what needs to be brought to the next tailgating party or what we’re doing for the game, true for almost any social event that I attend and I enjoy it. Feeding people is almost as enjoyable as writing…and pissing people off. <— Sarcasm

If you must know, my closet is littered with LSU caps, tees, tanks – and yes, even a dress or two – as well as a light peppering of Saints attire, sans monograms, I know what my initials are and don’t need to be reminded. <— Zing.  I don’t hate gathering for a game, I think it’s fun. I don’t think artists or actors or musicians are any better than athletes because at the end of it, they’re all just human too.

I still stand by the fact – and will rephrase my statement since the sentiment was received poorly – that no one should be paid excessively, no one should receive that much glorification, regardless of profession. Not artists, actors, musicians or athletes. I feel like the only thing that really merits such compensation is medical/environmental research because that is truly beneficial to society, regardless of whether or not you’re directly affected by the research and its outcome. To the other end of the spectrum, – and Oh gaaaad what am I doing by saying it- I think it’s wild for churches to spend millions of dollars on a building (I can say this; my former church home is spending gobs of money on renovation right now.) That money could be spent on missions, building homes and churches in other countries. I understand the notion of community outreach, but when your current building has already purchased homes only to tear them down to create more parking for your giant building, how much good are you doing? I could talk about the blasphemy that is the Susan G. Komen foundation and how excessive Nancy Brinker is, but I feel like I’d be beating a dead horse. Am I going to have to apologize for everything that seems disagreeable and offensive, so no one’s feelings get hurt? <— Zing.

I really loathe how social media spins things, though I had a lightbulb moment with it this week. I think I finally figured out how to use it. Audiences are easy to draw; you just have to push the right buttons. I wish I would have thought ahead enough to claim this as an experiment, would have been a smart move on my part.

Kudos to all of you who have read and commented, on anything thus far; I really appreciate it. I don’t think anyone quite understands how much I love this. I live for observation of the human experience and my desire to reflect and write about it; I don’t think anything has stirred me quite so much in my nearly twenty-eight years of existence. I love experiencing things, writing down my observations and gauging the reactions. I’m sure I lost a few people this week because I didn’t write a fluffy something about how in love I am. I’m sure someone read what I wrote and re-evaluated me as a person over my emotionalism about football, obviously a solid trait to judge. <— Zing!  I’m sure someone incorrectly picked up my tone and thinks I’m the most pretentious person they’ve ever met, when they don’t even know me; that’s what social media does, skews perception. It’s the age we live in and we have to live with the judgement that comes along with utilizing such a fickle tool.

Damn it, this should have been an open letter. This is what I get for writing without the correct amount of caffeine.

Here’s this lovely song. Don’t judge my musical tastes too hard.

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2 thoughts on “socially speaking

  1. Seriously the dislike button on Facebook is the worst idea ever. I agree, we do NOT need more negativity on the internet!!

    It’s a struggle, because you want to be authentic and share your story or whatever, but there is always that one person who will bring you down. And we focus so much on the negative, as humans, that we typically won’t remember all of the ‘likes’ or nice comments from others. We will remember that one ignorant soul who had the audacity to say something mean, for the rest of the world to read.

    But still, you always write passionately, and I think that is what counts. Ignore the haters, they are here to stay. And, if you ask me, others can see right through them when they pick a fight for no good reason.

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